Who We Are
by Doctor Wheel
Summary: Everyone has a secret to hide from others. For three lifelong friends, however, that secret could put a large target on their backs. It is easy keeping a secret, however, keeping it from others is a whole other thing, especially when you're a monster.
1. The Reunion

**A/N: Ok here we go, round two. Old chapter with a new beginning.**

 **One Punch Man belongs to One, anything else belongs to me. The story takes place after the Dark Matter Thieves Arc, or when Season 1 of the anime ended.**

* * *

A lone person walked down the rainy sidewalk of City H. Not much other people were out because of the torrents of water falling from the heavens as well as the time of day it was. It was late at night and the person was trying to get back home to get some well deserved rest.

The said person was a man around his late twenties, his jet black messy hair and unkept mustache was soaked with water. He wore a blue, hoodless windbreaker over a white collared shirt with black pants and shoes. The man had a slight athletic build to him, but looked quite stocky.

"Goddamn security company and their stupid hours," he muttered. "Why can't I have a normal schedule like anyone else?"

 _At least they pay..._ "Beats working at some dumb fast food joint."

After walking a few minutes down the street, he realized something.

"Aw crap, I'm supposed to take a left five blocks ago! Gosh darn it!" he facepalmed and started to turn around...

...only to be grabbed from behind, bagged, and thrown into the trunk of a car.

This day couldn't be any worse for this man...or could it be looking up...?

 **Eventually...**

The man squinted as the bag was pulled off his head, his eyes adjusting to the sudden change in light. As his eyes refocused, he was able to make out a figure that was in front of him.

"Carlos?" the man asked. "What-what is going on?"

Carlos chuckled. The man was a giant, towering over the other men in the room. He was balding and had a large red beard. He wore a green shirt with a white apron and khaki pants and brown shoes. "Ignorance will only make it worse, Vern. You know why I had my men bring you here." he rumbled.

"Carlos, I just came off a fifteen hours shift from work. I'm slightly delusional, and I just want to sleep. How the hell am I supposed to know-oh. Oh, you gotta be kidding me. Really?"

"Yes, your TAB. It is long overdue."

"How much are there? It can't be that much for you to-"

One of Carlos' men dropped a bag full of IOUs next to Vern. "-kidnap me..."

"I warned you MANY times Vern, but this...this is the last straw."

"So what? Are you going to kill me like any cliché guy will do in any type of situation?"

"Kill you?" he put his hand on one of his thugs before letting out a hearty laugh. "He thinks I am going to kill! Isn't that hilarious?!"

"So can I go then? If you're not going to kill me?"

"No, you are still going to die. Just not by me." he motioned to his men. "They will take care of you."

"Oh, very clever..." _I should've seen that coming_

"Anyways, I have two daughters that I need to take to school tomorrow. So farewell, and pleasure doing business with you." he turned and left the warehouse leaving Vern with his men.

"Uh, hi. I guess we start with introductions..." Vern hesitantly said as the thugs started to advance to him. "...and we're skipping the introductions and going straight in. Fine by me."

Luckily, whoever tied the knots to his binds were badly done and was able to free himself with little to no problem. He picked up the chair he was sitting on and quickly swung it at the first thug who charged him. The chair took out the brute before shattering.

Another came at him with a fist, but Vern simply sidestepped and grabbed the man by the arm. Using his leverage, he threw the guy into another thug taking both of them out.

"Are you guys even try-" he was caught off guard by a sucker punch and was sent flying into a pile of crates. "...ok, I'm done playing."

He placed his left hand in his pocket and lunged for the closest thug with his right. He grabbed the man by his neck and slammed him to the ground, causing cracks to form under him. He latched his hand onto another's face and started to drag the man on the ground before sending him flying with a kick.

As more and more thugs ran towards him, Vernn started to look a bit...different. The calm, stoic expression he had was slowly turning into one of a crazed psychopath, and his attacks became more and more violent and wild.

This was all done with one hand, mind you.

"You boys are sure giving me a run for my money! Kinda rusty, but I still got it!" he was smacked in the head with a pipe by a goon that snuck on him. The goon expected him to be knocked out, but instead was grabbed by the head and lifted in the air.

"My, my, trying to kill me? Now that is not very nice," he said with a very sadistic smile. "Maybe I should teach you a lesson...or everyone in this room in fact!"

He lined up in front of the remaining thugs and tossed the man in the air. As the man came down, he clenched his hand into a fist, which started seeping with maroon colored smoke, and slammed it into the man's chest.

"DRILLLLLLL!"

The man was sent helicoptering into the rest of the thugs and the entire group of men were left unconscious and badly hurt.

Vern expression slowly returned to his usual stoicalness and he ran a hand through his hair. "Well, guess I hafta find a new bar then." he said with a shrug as he walked out of the warehouse.

* * *

"Seriously? Too qualified, is that even a thing?"

A woman slumped onto a nearby park bench. She wore a black suit jacket and matching skirt, along with black leggings and heels. Her brown hair was done in a bun with two hairsticks to hold it up. She had a slim, yet curvy build.

Adjusting her purple, sharp-rimmed glasses, she sighed. She'd been turned down from yet another job just because she "was too qualified and would have made everyone look bad". She'd heard of people being not under qualified, but over?

Really?

"I really need to find a proper job soon. How am I supposed to pay rent?" she said with a moan. "Or any other basic necessity?"

She worked at the local supermarket as a cashier, but the pay wasn't up there enough. She barely had enough for rent, much less anything else.

"Lynn? Is that you?"

Lynn removed her hand from her face to see the face of someone she didn't see for quite some time.

The woman standing in front of her was wearing a short white shirt the ended above her stomach, blue jeans and black sneakers. Her long orange hair was put up in a high ponytail. However the most defining feature this woman had was that she was quite muscular to say the least, but kept her womanly curves.

"Roxy! Fancy seeing you here."

Roxy smiled. "I kinda had to look twice, since you look...bigger... than the last time we met."

"Yeah...very late bloomer." Lynn said with a blush.

"So! What have you've been up to egghead?" Roxy asked. "Assume you got some high end job or something, right?"

"Actually, no."

"Wait what?"

"I tried applying to several businesses but they turned me down."

"Why? You are more than capable to be-"

"That's the problem! I'm TOO good at what I do."

Roxy blinked. "Is that a thing?"

"Apparently so. Sounds bullshit to me though," Lynn said with a sigh. "I work at a supermarket to make due, it's very little, but it's enough to pay the rent. What about you?"

"I work at that smoothie store over there." she pointed to the small establishment off in the distance. "Share a space with my GF. She pays half and I pay the other."

"GF?" Lynn asked, a bit confused.

"Girlfriend, egghead. You know men ain't my thing."

 _Men not here thi-oh...OH OH!_ "You sound like you have it good..."

"Say...why don't you come crash with us?"

"No! T-that's not necessary-"

"Lynn, I may be reckless, but I am far from stupid. I know that you're in the shitter, and you, egghead, should know that too." she pulled out a receipt and a pen and started writing something on it. "This is where I live and my number, I ain't forcing you, but it's your choice."

She gave the paper to Lynn, who accepted it.

"My shift starts in a few minutes so I gotta run. See yah."

Lynn watched as Roxy walked off. She sighed as she looked at the paper that was given to her. _Well, at least the rent wouldn't be so high._

 **Later...**

"You know I don't drink a lot Roxy," Lynn said.

"Oh lighten up will you?" Roxy said. "Obviously things haven't been going your way, and you kinda need to loosen up."

It was late at night and Roxy had invited Lynn to have a couple of drinks at a bar she favored. Lynn had changed into a more casual blue shirt, khaki pants, and some sneakers.

"Fine, I just don't take alcohol well."

"Ha, ha! It's just gonna be like old times!" Roxy said a she pulled the shorter woman closer to her. "If only the psycho was here..."

"Urg, gah, meh...ROXI! C-c-can't breath!"

"Oh! Sorry!" Roxi let go of Lynn, who spent the next few minutes trying to catch her breath.

"Still got your strength huh?" she managed to wheeze out.

"Yeah...still kinda hard for me to control it. My bad."

"At least you don't burn things as easily anyone as far as I can see."

"True, got that down."

Roxi suddenly sneezed and a blast of fire incinerated a trashcan. Luckily, no one else was around to witness that.

"Well, except for that. That I can't really control, sometimes," Roxi said as she sniffed. "Don't worry, we have a fire extinguisher just in case."

"If I remember your drinking patterns from yore, I'm surprised you never burnt anything down yet."

"Whatever, at least I can hold my alcohol, egghead."

The bar was located a couple of blocks from Roxi's apartment. A small watering hole with a decent amount of foot traffic. However, tonight was pretty slow, and only one or two patrons were in the bar.

The two women took up seats at the counter.

"The usual Roxi?" the bartender asked.

"Yes, Maurice."

The bartender nodded and went off to prepare the drinks.

"So, how's life been?" Roxi asked.

"Well, you kinda got the jist of it this afternoon," Lynn said with a sigh. "Honestly, I just think they're afraid of having a woman outperform them."

"Male superiority, shall I...?"

"No, you are not beating them up. That's illegal and possibly a quick way to get on the Heroes Association's bad side."

"Even if I don't use-"

"Yes, most likely they're going to send a C or B-Class hero after you if anything."

"...hey, what would we be if we tried out for the Heroes Association, hypothetic speaking?"

"Us? I dunno, I'm not really into that hero stuff, too much goddamn work."

"Work? I thought you like work."

"I only do work since no one else is willing to do it."

Roxi shrugged and was about to say something when someone's voice started to rise.

"Oh you gotta be SCREWING with me!"

The two turned and found a guy getting frustrated with the claw game the bar had in the corner.

"You piece of shit! I had that pink unicorn in my grasp and you had to drop it!" the man slammed the side of the machine. "You're lucky I can't break you..."

"Hold on. Is that...?"

The two looked at each other and decided to go over to the man, who was still ranting about the "rigged" machine. Roxi tapped the man on the shoulder...

"WHAT?!" he spun around only to look up. His expression turned to slight shock. "Oh hiiiiiiiiiii Roxi. Fancy seeing you here."

His attention turned to Lynn. "Holy shit, Lynn. You actually look like a woman now-"

 _ **"What was that Vern?"**_ Vern suddenly found his health to be in dire danger.

"T-that was a compliment! And I wasn't finished! I meant to add on: the "sexy librarian" is a good look for you."

"Better...now what are you doing here?"

"Well, uh, I'm trying to get the pink unicorn. I have the other colors but that one-"

"More general."

"Uh, I'm waiting for my shift to start. I work for a security firm, like a few blocks from here," he said. "What about you two, never thought I would see either of you again."

"Lynn is broke dead, I work at Smooth's Smoothies."

"Wait, seriously? Is that even possible?"

"Apparently being too good is a thing," Lynn said with a sigh.

"On the plus, she's going to be roomies with me! It will be like old times!" Roxi said as she hugged Lynn.

"Hold on, how long have you guys been living here?"

"I'd say a couple of years." Lynn said. Roxi nodded her head as well.

"I'm surprised we've never bumped into each other, strange...yet we meet in a bar."

"..."

"Well, hey our drinks are here," Roxi said as she looked back at the counter. "Want anything Vern?"

"Uh, something...strong. I'll catch up to you gals in a moment."

As the two walked back, Vern got out a knife and picked the lock on the claw machine. He grabbed the unicorn and stuffed it into his coat pocket.

"Fuck you." he said to the machine as he closed it back up.

 **A/N: The next chapter will be similar to what it was in the previous story, but amended to fit it.**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	2. Demons Galore!

"So Vern, how is your mental state?" Lynn asked. "I presume it's been keeping in line?"

"Oh yeah, it's been fine. We've gotten to a point where we can live without tearing to bits, though a bit of booze kinda helps as well." Vern said as he swirled the shot glass of scotch around.

"Shouldn't you not be drinking? Aren't you going to work?" Roxi asked.

"Does it matter, Rox? At this point alcohol is more like medicine to me, it helps me to...concentrate and focus."

"That not her point Vern," Lynn said. "She means...you know what forget it."

"Whatever smartypants, those fuckers don't even care about their workers anyways. So they can stick a fat one up their arse."

The three sat in silence for a couple of minutes. The television blared out some news that no one really cared about.

"Anyone hear what happened in City A?" Vern asked. "Aliens I think it was."

"Oh yeah, aliens came and razed the city to the ground," Roxi said. "It was pretty bad."

"I wonder if the Heroes Association is losing their touch," Vern said. "After all, remember the City J incident?"

"Yeah, luckily that C-Class hero showed up and defeated that monster, especially after it defeated two S-Classes," Lynn said. "Can't believe people are accusing him with taking all the credit, especially when he's the only one that made a dent on that thing."

"That's unfortunate to say the least." Roxi said. "Maybe he is the hero this place needs..."

"Hero?! That bald-headed freak shouldn't even be called a HERO!" a random patron yelled. "Several other heroes laid down their bodies against that monster and all he did was one punch it. Puh-leeze!"

"And there's the migraine...coming back to haunt me." Lynn muttered.

"It's just an opinion dude," Vern said. "Chill, ok?"

The man continued to rant for a good while until bar employees escorted the man from the bar.

"Thank god he's gone. Any longer and I would've lost my shit." Lynn said as she rubbed her head.

"Still have those migraines? Honestly, I thought you'd grew out of that by now." Vern said. "Must suck for you whenever you go to a loud event-ooooooooooo-"

"You better retract that burn before I turn you into a pretzel." she hissed.

"...annnnnnnd retracted."

Roxi chuckled and sighed. "You two act like an old married couple." she said. "It's adorable."

The redhead got glared at. "What? You two do, you basically act the same in a sense. Well, Vern is mentally unstable and you're short-tempered. You both are sadistic when you're unhindged."

"Stop please, I don't want to hear any more." Lynn said.

"And I take personal offense to that," Vern said. "I'm NOT mentally unstable, more like socially awkward."

Another uncomfortable minute past once again as the three returned to their drinks.

"Have you two caught up on the latest episode of 'Game of Bones'?" Roxi asked.

* * *

On the outskirts of City H, a large demon-like monster stared down at the city from atop an overlook. It had red skin and two curly ram horns sticking out of its head, and was dressed only in a brown loincloth. It had large, bulging muscles that would intimidate even the most toughest guys out there.

The demon had a small army of smaller demons, who still looked pretty intimidating though, standing beside him.

"Today I, Dezorus the Deadly, will be the first to conquer the human realm for the UNDERWORLD!" he bellowed. "No one will stand in my way! No ONE!"

The other demons roared in response to their leader's wishes.

"The invasion of upper realm begins NOW!"

* * *

"YOU REALLY THINK JUNO IS THE BEST BAE?!" Lynn yelled. "Bitch please! Fhari is the best bae in the goddamn series first off. Secondly, Juno is just a stupid slut who needs her ass saved by Captain Dogo every time!"

"EXCUSE ME?! Roxi yelled back. "Juno is perfectly capable of defending herself, she only gets captured because the enemy always uses some kind of crutch to SCREW HER OVER!"

"HA! FHARI DOESN'T HAVE A TRUE COUNTER, SHE'S THE BEST!"

Vern slammed his fist on the counter. "YOU BITCHES ARE WRONG! BEATRICE IS BEST GIRL!" he flashed two birds. "SUCK IT!"

For the past thirty minutes, the trio's conversation on the highly rated t.v show 'Game of Bones' went from a light conversation to a heated debate, which was, well, which of the (usually) scantly clad female characters was 'the best'.

It didn't help that the alcohol only added more fuel to the fire.

"BEATRICE! That slut is even more of a slut than Juno! Why the fuck do you like her?!" Lynn yelled.

"Well excuse me, smartypants! She may look like one, but she ain't! Her attitude says otherwise, unlike yours, biotch!"

"You're lucky that this fat OAF is in the way. If she wasn't here, you would be on your ass right now!"

"EXCUSE ME?! Who do you'd think you're calling fat, bitch?!" Roxi growled.

"She is, still pudgey aren't yeah?" Vern said.

Roxi slammed a fist into Vern's face and sent him flying into a nearby storage closet. There was a bit, wait no, a lot, of crashing and things breaking. "I TOTALLY DID NOT DESERVE THAT!" he yelled from the closet. "Fatass."

"You are slowly signing your **death warrant,** Vern!"

"I plea innocent on ground of pure insanity! Plus it's true, I never lie!"

"He's kinda right. He never lies." Lynn reasoned. "Though he could be a little less blunt."

"You started this, egghead. I wouldn't get cocky just yet." the larger woman said as she glared at Lynn. Her eyes briefly turned into reptilian slits before returning to normal.

Lynn rolled her eyes and went back to her drink.

Vern stumbled out of the closet with no injuries and dusted himself off. "How did I manage to fly in here? I mean this is perpendicular to the counter." he mumbled to himself.

He walked back to the bar counter and sat back on his stool. Surprisingly none of the other bar customers cared what just happened.

However, they did react to a couple of demons jumping though the bar's front window.

The bar cleared out in little to no time, but not everyone left. The three 'friends' still sat in their seats, totally oblivious on what just happened. Their obliviousness could be a result of them continuing their conversation.

"In all honestly, how did our little conversation turn into a raging shitfest in the first place?" Vern asked.

"I don't know, but I don't care since you got slugged in the face, which makes me slightly happier." Lynn said.

Vern threw his glass at Lynn, but missed and hit one of the demons in the face, causing it to snarl.

"Well I'll be damned. You don't see that everyday." Vern said. "Or before you die."

"When did they come?" Roxi asked. "Did we miss something?"

The demon who had a glass thrown at its face roared and lunged toward Vern. But Vern leaned backwards, allowing Roxi to slam her fist into the demon's face. The demon soared out of the bar, though the window, and into a parked car, causing its alarm to go off.

The other demon ripped a large table off the ground and hurled it at the three. Vern punched the table, causing it to shatter before it hit them. Lynn, in the mean time, launched herself at the demon and swung her leg at the demon, sending it flying into the wall of the bar and leaving a demon-shaped hole.

"Hm, that was easy," she said as she readjusted her glasses. "Honestly I thought spawns of hell would be slightly harder to defeat."

Suddenly the same demon shot back out of the hole, and hurled itself towards Lynn. It pulled back a fist with full intent to smash HER face in.

Lynn's hand started to crackle with electricity. She curled her hand into a fist and backhanded the demon. Electricity surged through the demon, briefly showing its skeleton, before it was sent into the same car where the first demon laid.

"Better, but still pathetic."

"You think it was only those two, cause there better not be any more-" Roxi started to say before an alert stopped her.

"Attention all residents of City H! A Demon-level threat has been detected. Please evacuate the city in a calm and orderly manner." a loudspeaker said.

 _"I find that ironic..."_ Vern thought.

"...and me and my big mouth..." she mumbled before realizing something. "I have to go."

"Wait, why?" Vern asked.

"Rita, I wanna make sure she's safe."

"Who's Rita?"

"Her girlfriend." Lynn answered.

"Oh yeah, you're not turned on by men." Vern said as he stood up off his stool. "How'd I forget that?"

Just then several more demons decided to arrive at the bar. All looking kinda pissed cause they beat up their comrades.

"And cue cliché scene where everyone tries to kill us." Lynn said as she rolled her sleeves up.

"I think I have to call in sick today." Vern said as he tossed his jacket to the side. "How far is it to your place, Rox?"

"Five minutes, ten tops." she said as she cracked her knuckles. "Are we racing?"

"Depends," Lynn asked. "Are we just finding your roomie or having fun?"

Roxi thought for a second. "Find Rita first, then we can have fun."

"Sounds good to me." Vern said as a grin crept on his face.

* * *

Class-A Heroes Golden Ball and Spring Mustachio were first on scene to confront the disturbance in City H. It didn't take long for them to encounter what was causing the disturbance, and the two sprung into action.

"Hey, Spring," Golden Ball said as he used his slingshot to take down a demon that charged him. "This doesn't look like a Demon-Level Threat. Looks like more of a Tiger."

"Appearances may be misleading, my friend," Spring said back. "Don't let your guard down."

Suddenly a man was thrown their way and into a car.

"Sir! Are you ok?" Golden Ball asked as he and Spring ran over to the man.

"Totally dude," the man said as he got up. "Just got chucked by a demon, no biggie."

"I suggest you should lay down so you can get medical attention-" Spring started to say.

"Medical attention? Screw that, I've been through worse before," the man said as he got to his feet and dusted himself off. "Nice 'stache dude."

A demon ran up to them and screeched. The man in response tore off the car's door and hurled it at the creature, slicing it in half.

"Love to stay and chat, but my friends are having a contest on who can kill the most demons, later." the man bolted down the street and out of view of the two. "You fuckers better not be killing without me!"

The two heroes blinked and looked at each other, still processing what exactly just happened.

"We should see what's going on." Spring said.

"Yeah..."

* * *

"Get off ME!" Roxi shouted as a demon hopped on her back. She grabbed the demon and threw it to the ground, cracking it in the process. She then planted her foot on top of its head, splattering blood and brain matter all over the ground. "I am not a ride, dammit!"

The trio battled their way to Roxy's apartment and found that Rita was out of town. So the three went on a demon killing spree since, why not?

Roxi punched, kicked, threw...you know what...she basically tore though the demon ranks with little to no effort. Her brute strength and relentlessness to pummel any demon by any means necessary made her a force to be reckoned with.

To put it into context, it was a gorilla smashing ants...and the gorilla was in a steamroller.

On the other hand, Lynn struck down each monster, but not with the same brutality Roxi employed. She nimbly dodged each attack the demons threw at her before striking her target with deadly accuracy. Each strike was powerful enough to kill each demon, but not enough to, say, explode a demon into a million pieces. It wasn't as 'flashy' as Roxi's display, but it was just as effective.

Lynn formed a gun with her right hand and pointed it a hoard of demons headed her way. Electricity crackled through her hand in white sparks.

"Boom."

The discharge jumped from demon to demon, cooking them to a crispy perfection.

Yum. (Just like Mama would've cooked them)

"Where's Vern?" Lynn asked. "I haven't seen him for five minutes."

"I dunno, but-" Roxi inhaled and let out a large blue flame that reduced a bunch of demons to ash. "He got knocked pretty far when we confronted the whole army."

"True, but he's usually back by now..."

"Hi guys!" Vern said as he landed in front of Lynn, smashing a demon in the process. "Sorry I'm late, I saw this cool radio that would go very well with this montage. Just had to have it."

"Why?"

"Cause every major battle scene HAS to have some music, DUH!" he put the radio down and turned it on.

 **(Music: Hot Right Now by Dj Fresh ft. Rita Ora)**

"Why can't I help but feel this is cliché?" Lynn asked.

"Well, to be honest, this song is great to work out to," Roxi said. "Love it."

"Oh! One other thing..."

"What is it, Vern?"

"I MAY or MAY not have...pissed off their leader." Vern said as he twiddled his thumbs. "And he's coming our way...like now."

Just then a very LARGE demon appeared in front of the three. He was at least ten heads taller than Roxi.

"YOU HUMANS **DARE** TO STOP THE DEZORUS THE DEADLY! I WILL **ELIMINATE** YOU PESTS!" he roared.

The three blinked, looked at each other, and blinked once again.

"What was his name again, Thesaurus?" Roxi asked. "Kinda hard with all the yelling."

"Ooooh, that must why he's pissed," Vern said. "Cause his parents named him after a stupid book."

"Sounds logical, I would be a little ticked off as well." Lynn agreed.

The demon lord actually recoiled in shock from the answer he got, but recomposed himself. "MY NAME IS **DEZORUS**! NOT **THESAURUS** , STUPID HUMANS!"

"Still hearing Thesaurus amigo," Roxi said. "Lynn, Vern you ready?"

"WHAT?!"

The demon didn't notice that two of the humans got to the top of two nearby businesses across from each other and were each charging up an attack. Lynn's arm crackled with white electricity while Vern's was covered in a maroon aura and shaking violently.

"CONTACT!" Vern yelled as he and Lynn launched themselves towards the demon's head.

The two fists made contact with the head and it exploded into a shower white and red light. When the light died down, the head was nowhere to be seen and the headless body flopped to the ground.

"That counts as one." Roxi said as she approached Vern and Lynn, who both landed safely on the ground.

"Whatever, I don't care," Vern said with a yawn. "I'm going to bed, catch some zzz's, later."

"Us too, see you Vern." Lynn said.

The two parties left in separate directions, unbeknownst to them they were being watched by Golden Ball and Spring Mustachio.

"Call the Association," Golden Ball said.

"One step ahead of you." Spring replied.

"No one gonna believe this..."

* * *

 **A/N: Quick things I want to address:**

 **1\. I do not know who's the most powerful out of the three. Vern, Lynn, and Roxi are powerful in their own way.**

 **2\. Threat levels are divided into the following categories (from lowest to highest): Wolf, Tiger, Demon, Dragon, God. (I wonder why Tiger is higher than Wolf, and Dragon higher than Demon, seems weird. I would have it as: Tiger, Wolf, Dragon, Demon, God.)**

 **A major thing I want to address is something that I have recently seen in someone else's story. I do not tolerate any hateful comments, reviews, , etc. Any of such will be** **deleted and reported. I only accept constructive** **criticism, any other negative comments (including but not limited to: death threats, racism, bigotry, etc) will be ignored, deleted, and reported. This also applies to other writers, guests, and others who view this site.**

 **Be nice to each other, ok?**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	3. Human?

**A/N: Any OPM character that does not have a name canon in OPM will not have a name unless said so by the magna or anime. Such examples are the Bearded and Bespectacled Worker.**

"Defeated a DEMON-level threat with NO problem?!" Sitch, the Hero Association's Minister Officer sputtered. "B-b-but that is almost impossible!"

"Yeah, it takes at least ten A-Class heroes or one S-Class hero to take down a Demon-level threat!" another staff member said. "Don't tell me three nobodies could've stopped this all by themselves!"

The Bearded Worker nodded. "True, if we were simply told that, we wouldn't believe it ourselves," he said. "But then, we would be trying to argue against Spring Mustachio and Golden Ball's eyewitness accounts."

"As well as the numerous surveillance footage that captured the battle." the Bespectacled Worker added as he brought up multiple videos of the battle that took place in City H.

"The three persons of interest consist of one male and two females," the Bearded Worker continued. "It took some digging, but we were able to find some information on these individuals."

"What do you mean, was it that hard?" Sitch asked.

"Well, it seems that these individuals are quite...underdocumented," the Bespectacled Worker said. "It's like they almost didn't exist until now."

"What he means is that they had no birth certificates, Social Security; basically no forms of identification whatsoever," the Bearded Worker said. "Surprising we didn't catch this earlier."

The Bearded Worker motioned to his partner and the screen displayed a mugshot. "The male individual is Vern Scuralli, age 28, works at Fuchii Security Firm," he said. "One of their best guards, in the last month he managed to stop at least a dozen break-ins during his night shift. "

The screen changed pictures. "The next person is a female named Roxi Lugar, age 29, works at Jubilee Juice..."

"Hot damn, she looks good!" a random staff member said, before getting looks. "What?"

"...um, she lives with a Rita Flores in an apartment."'

The picture changed.

"Lastly, we have Lynn Watanabe, age 28, currently unemployed."

"She's unemployed? a staff member asked. "Why?"

"According to the transcripts from the multiple business firms she applied to: the companies say she's 'too good' and makes everyone else look bad." the Bespectacled Worker said.

"..."

"That's the stupidest thing I have heard," a member said, breaking the silence. "Is that a thing?"

"Apparently it is, perfect GPA, sped through grad school for business...damn, we should hire her, why didn't that come up earlier?"

"As much how I like this conversation, we're missing the big picture," Sitch said. "Are they a threat to us?"

The Bearded Worker cleared his throat. "Um, well, from initial reports, they seemed a bit...laid back. This entire battle was more of a "contest of who can kill the most demons", rather than a legitimate battle."

"And they're not registered with the Association?"

"No and it doesn't appear they know it exists. The man encountered Spring Mustachio and Golden Ball, but didn't recognize them, even though they're high ranking A-Class heroes."

The other staff members whispered among themselves for some time before falling silent.

"We should we do about them?" a staff member asked.

"Well, they don't seem to be much of a threat of now..." Sitch started. "And we don't want to antagonize them either by going in to confront them."

"..."

"Keep a close eye on them, if things get out of hand...I just hope it doesn't have to come to that."

* * *

"I was expecting you to have more things with you." Roxi said.

A couple of days had passed since the demon invasion and life went on for City H as usual. It was now Saturday and Lynn had come over to Roxi's place to move in.

"Enchanted suitcases, very handy for traveling," Lynn motioned to the two suitcases next to her.

"Hm, I could use one of those."

"You can have one, I have five in one of the suitcases right now," she said. "For some reason, my father is very insistent on keeping organized, even though one suitcase is enough."

"You realize the irony of that right?"

"Whatever." Lynn said with a roll of her eyes.

Roxi's apartment was similar to the one Lynn was in, a few bedrooms, a bathroom, a kitchen area, etc.

"Wait, where do you sleep, Roxi?" Lynn asked, she only saw two beds in total, and was wondering if she was kicking Roxi out of one.

"The couch, why?"

"Don't you sleep on any of the beds?"

"Um, well, the beds are kinda...small for me. Besides, I consider sleeping on something soft to be of a luxury."

"...ok."

"Anyways, just make yourself at home. I'm going to shower."

The room was pretty simple. A bed, a small closet, a dresser, basically anything that a spare/guest room would have.

"Better than nothing..." she mumbled as she started to unpack.

* * *

"Easy pickings." Vern said as he walked out of a pawn shop.

For some time, Vern had been "borrowing" some items of value off of intruders who broken into the warehouse he patrols and selling it for some cash. Sure it may be wrong, but then again breaking into a warehouse is most likely just as bad as stealing someone's belongings.

"This makes this month's rent, still wish I'd got more for the watch though."

He pocketed the couple hundreds and twenties he got and walked down the street. A couple minutes passed and he noticed two men arguing from an alley. Curious, he stopped and decided to listen in.

"Dude, we need to hide the cash before the police find us!" one said. "We gotta ditch and go."

"Why, can't we take it?" the other asked.

"I've seen others get caught because the cash bag has trackers on them. If we take it with us, we're dead meat."

"But if we leave the cash here the police will find it and we won't have anything!"

"But not if we hide it where the tracker can't transmit. This metal dumpster seems to be a good place, we'll stash the loot here, lose the cops, and pick up our reward."

"Sounds good," said the second robber as he tossed the duffel into the dumpster.

The two robbers hightailed it out the other end of the alley and out of sight.

Vern looked around to see if anyone was watching before casually strolling into the alley. He got out the duffel and started to shift through its contents.

"Trackers in the bags huh? Sophisticated, yet impractical," he said as he dumped the money into the duffel. "Dum-dums could've taken the money OUT of the bags. Their loss, not mine."

He slung the duffel over his shoulder. "One man's trash IS another man's treasure."

* * *

"Authorities today have apprehended the two armed robbers who robbed the city's bank today," the television blared. "However, the money is still missing. Anyone with information to this should call authorities..."

Roxi and Lynn both turned to Vern and glared at him. He didn't care though, as he was still counting the stacks of bills. It wasn't hard to connect two and two as soon as he walked into Roxi's apartment with the duffle full of cash.

"Vern, you gotta return the money." Lynn said.

"I'd rather not." he replied.

"And why not?"

"There's a high chance I will get arrested for doing so."

"He's kinda right, you know." Roxi said. "Obstruction of justice, I believe?"

"Yeah, that," Vern said as he placed down the last stack. "So, I've split it into four piles, one for Lynn, one for Roxi, one for me, and one for my family."

"Hold on, why do you get two?" Lynn asked.

"I thought you were against getting money, Miss Unemployed?" he said with a smirk.

"You're pushing it, I'd watch out."

Vern rolled his eyes. "I'm only getting one stack, smartypants. The other goes back to my family, and if you don't remember THEY need this stuff to get supplies, unlike you two's families which don't need to rely on the humans to function."

"And if you ALSO forgot, my mother needs to feed my eleven younger siblings as well. This that enough of an explanation?"

Lynn crossed her arms and huffed.

"I'd take that as a 'yes'," he said as he piled his cash back into the duffle. "Now excuse me, I have to make arraignments so this can get to my family."

As Vern left the apartment, Lynn sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "This idiot is going to blow our cover. It may not be today, not tomorrow, but SOME day, he will."

"Oh lighten up, will you?" Roxi said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Vern may be psychotic, but he ain't stupid, he's a Jyster after all."

"Yeah, but he's bound to slip up eventually. No one's perfect."

"And neither are you Librarian."

"Shut it Draco, the last thing I want today is to get lectured...again."

Lynn was suddenly picked up by the back of her sweater and was now face to face with the redhead, her feet dangling off the ground.

"Well, if you don't want to be lectured. I can provide an alternate, which is much more enjoyable for me." Roxi said, her warm, comforting face was now filled with venom and malice.

Lynn sighed. "I'm just stressed ok? I have no job, no home, and one of my friends decided to take stolen money..."

Roxi's face softened. "Your goddamn race has instilled too much order into you, stuff ain't going to go your way all the time," she said. "Say, why don't we get some grub? There's a ramen shop not far from here."

"Ok..." Lynn said as she was put down.

* * *

 **A/N: Bios...**

 **Vern Scuralli  
Species: Jyster  
Age: 28  
Height: 6' 1''  
Weight: 209 lbs**

 **Roxi Lugar  
Species: Draco**  
 **Age: 29**  
 **Height: 7' 5''**  
 **Weight: 298 lbs**

 **Lynn Watanabe**  
 **Species:** **Librarian**  
 **Age: 28  
** **Height: 5' 10''  
** **Weight: 164 lbs**

 **Not going to explain anything else.**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	4. Monster Facts 1

Excerpt from Dr. Kulebrix's Monster Encyclopedia pg. 274-298

Jyster ( _humanus mimicus_ )  
Type: Humanoid  
Threat: Minimal-Extreme

Jysters are one of the earliest known monsters to man. They are most noted for creating the circus that we all know and love today. What makes them so interesting is their ability to mimic actions of others to near perfection. This allows younger generations to easily catch on what they are supposed to do when they need to relieve their older counterparts of their duties.

This mimic ability also has a practical use when it come to self-defense. A Jyster is able to repeat any attack an enemy performs after seeing it once, but there are limitations the mimic ability has. The mimic ability cannot replicate attacks that the Jyster cannot perform on its own, say a dragon's fire breath for an example.

Other than its mimic ability, the Jyster has some kind of spiritual energy within itself. Said energy can manifest into a physical form, but said form is transparent and nigh-invisible. The Jysters are able to form this energy into objects which they can use for defense. Their way of summoning said objects can be akin to a mime performance. Some of their objects range from rapiers, to hammers, and to the infamous Mime Wall. I have heard that the objects can be slightly altered to better suit the Jyster, but that is pure speculation. An odd thing I've found out is that Jysters cannot mimic other Jysters' summoning, implying that this summoning must be learned on one's own accord. A side note to add is that Jysters can only summon non-ranged objects, like they cannot summon a bow.

Aside from their inhuman speed and strength, Jysters are unnaturally durable. In my times of recording this species, I have seen Jysters get into seemingly precarious situations, but only to defy death by coming out of it with little to no injuries. Burns, falls, crushes, cuts...they don't seem to be affected at all. I wonder if they can die another way than natural causes...?

Unlike most humanoid monsters, Jysters are not easily identifiable and cannot be easily distinguished from a normal human at a glance. What makes them distinguishable is their behavior. A Jyster's normal behavior is considered to be...insane when compared to our normal behavior. However, I find that the more unhinged a Jyster becomes, the more powerful it gets.

Besides their psychotic nature, Jysters are typically friendly and more than not mischievous to a certain degree, making them one of the few monsters which aren't a direct threat to humans...that is, if you don't anger one. Like an animal defending its own, a Jyster will not cease attacking until the threat is eliminated, however their abilities mentioned above make them extremely hard to stop once they are triggered.

Luckily for humanity, Jysters are hard to anger, though I would be extra kind to one if you've ever meet one.


	5. An Average Day

"Another break in Vern?"

"Yup, north end. Smashed a window to get in." Vern said to his supervisor.

"Jeez, why are people trying to get into this warehouse anyways?" the supervisor said. "There's nothing of actual value in here."

"Well, there's food. Maybe they're hungry?"

"How do you know there's food in here?"

"Oh it's simple," he produced a clipboard. "So you see, to keep myself busy, I go around and categorize what's in the warehouse. It also allows me to know if something got stolen as well." He slid his finger down before tapping it on the clipboard. "There is five hundred units of some off-brand cereal, six hundred units of flax seed, ninety-two pounds of dried milk...still find it strange they house food with hardware stuff though..."

"It's for a superstore, what do you expect?"

"Ooh! So that's why there's gasoline and matches in here, gotcha."

"Wait, wait, wait, what?"

"Didn't you hear me? I said there's matches and gasoline next to each other, which is also next to the propane and rags, located in row five, next to the smoking area."

"T-t-that's a fire hazard! Why didn't you report this?"

"Uh, I work for you guys, not for this company. I could care less if this thing goes up in flames. I just catch anyone who breaks in, not find out if something could make a building explode."

"..."

"Anyways, my shift is over. You can have this," he shoved the clipboard into the supervisor's hands. "I kinda have it memorized so I don't really need it."

The supervisor blinked and sighed. He wished he had some kind of raise to compensate for what just happened.

* * *

"So no job yet, huh?" Roxi asked.

"Yup, this harder than it looks." Lynn said with a sigh.

The three were back in the same bar they met in before, though things were not as upbeat as usual.

"Do feel so down on yourself, Lynn. Someone will eventually see your talent for knowing everything." Vern said. "Though I wonder why no is hiring you at all."

Lynn faceplanted on the counter and groaned. "This is the shittiest moment in my pitiful existence of anyone who has ever existed."

Roxi and Vern looked at each other with worried looks. Lynn has always been downgrading to herself for a long time, but this...this was something else entirely.

"Hey, Lynn," Vern started. "Why don't I try to see if you can work with me?"

"A security guard? Really?"

"Yeah! It's literally a no brainer job, and it kinda pays well," he continued. "Just forge some documents and you're all set."

Lynn turned to Roxi. "Do you have anything?"

Roxi shook her head. "My place just finished hiring some summer employees, no job openings."

"Fine, just don't get on my nerves," she said to Vern.

"Great, though I may be getting reassigned soon."

"Why?"

"Well, I inadvertently discovered the place I was watching had several building and safety violations, and it kinda caught the attention of upper management," he said. "May get moved to somewhere where more attentiveness is needed."

"What kind of violations?"

"Flammable materials placed next to a smoking area was the first, which I found. Later inspections revealed outdated fire systems, place hasn't been inspected in years...I can go on." he pulled out a plastic bag and handed it to Lynn. "Here, take it."

"What is this?"

"Documents, since we're "not humans" I took the liberty of getting you two identities since I believe you two didn't establish yours with enough creditability. You can thank me later."

"How did you get this?" Roxi asked.

"Jyster secrets. We've been among humans longer than anyone else, natural for us to blend in with no problem," he drained the rest of his drink before getting to his feet. "Now if you excuse me, I have to head to work, bye."

The two looked through the documents and found them to be pretty convincing...too convincing in fact.

"Wow, they look pretty legit, even got the shiny coat to it." Roxi said.

"Probably threatened some guy to make them." Lynn said.

"So are you going to take the job?"

"I don't have a choice do I?"

* * *

Out of the three, Roxi was the second best at keeping her temper in check, while Vern takes first in staying cool as a cucumber. She has no idea how he keeps his cool at all; any insult, slander, and harsh criticism is simple brushed away as if they didn't mean anything to him. It was like he didn't care whatsoever.

She wished she had his level of cool and collectiveness right now.

Today, a shipment of ingredients that was supposed to arrive did not come, which meant the smoothie store couldn't make majority of its smoothies. Add to the fact it was unnaturally hot as well created quite the conundrum.

Roxi was also the manager of the store, which meant SHE had to deal with the hordes of unhappy people complaining about not getting their drinks.

"Listen up everyone!" she yelled. "Our weekly shipment did not come in today! We are out of most of our ingredients so we can't make majority of your orders! Come back tomorrow or order something else!"

Unfortunately, her voice was not heard over the mob that was rapidly forming in and in front of the store.

"This is getting ridiculous." she muttered.

"Any luck?" a female employee asked.

"Nope, I swear this is going to turn into a full blown riot if we don't do something," Roxi said. "What did corporate say?"

"They given us permission to close...but I don't think they will like it."

The redhead looked at the mob and sighed, looks like she had to be the one to break the news. "Hey, do we still have coconuts?"

"Yeah why?"

"I'm going to make a point."

Another employee went into the back and came back with a unripe, green coconut.

"Thank you," she said as she took the fruit. "Whistle."

The female employee blew a sharp note and the crowd went silent.

"Ok, listen up! I'm only going to say this once and once only," she shouted. "We have little supplies, which means we are serving a limited menu, so order from the limited menu or leave!"

The crowd started to protest, but were stopped again with another note.

"Look, I know you're stressed, but am just as stressed as you are. But if you still want to complain..." she closed her hand and promptly crushed the coconut, its juices ran down her arm. "...you can take it up with me, are we clear?"

Majority of the people in the crowd blinked, blinked again, looked at each other, and dispersed quietly. A few others lined up to order from the smaller menu.

"Problem solved." Roxi turned to find stunned expressions from her co-workers. "What?"

"Could you always do that?" an employee asked.

"Yeah, how do you think I crack the coconuts every morning?"

"Don't you use a hammer or something?"

Roxi chuckled. "Nah, a hammer would've destroyed the coconut, and maybe the hammer in the process as well," she tossed the shattered fruit to him. "Now get to work, we got customers!"

* * *

"Eh, eh, what did I tell you?"

"Vern, if you utter one more word, I will pound your face in."

"Come on, you just mad I was able to get you a job, something YOU couldn't do."

"I swear VERN, if you don't shut your trap..."

Vern didn't say anything, but the smirk he gave Lynn was almost infuriating to the female.

Needless to say, the firm hired Lynn on the spot, and with some string pulling by Vern, the two monsters were able to work together as partners assigned to the city's bank. Lynn now wore a similar attire to Vern, minus the jacket.

"Can you just get through one night shift without annoying me?"

"But isn't that what I do even though I don't try?"

"Gahhhhhhh..."

Suddenly Vern's radio crackled to life. "Hey, guys. Something is going on by camera thirty-five."

"What's going on?" Vern answered.

"I don't know, it's all static. Can't see a thing."

"We'll check it out, over." Vern let go of his radio. "Thirty-five huh? Welp, let's go."

Camera thirty-five overlooked the front area of the bank, where all the teller windows were. The two entered the main area of the bank and located the camera, which was hanging in the top corner of the room.

"Chuck, everything looks fine here. Can you see us through the camera?"

"..."

"Chuck, you read me?"

"..."

"Chuckie, Chuck, you hoo!"

"..."

"How much do you want to bet he's out cold?" Lynn asked.

"I thought you weren't the one to gamble?"

"I take my chances sometimes."

"I check on Chuck, you get the guys in the vault."

"Of course."

The two headed off in separate directions to where the robbers may be. Vern opened the door of the control room to find a barrel of a gun staring at him.

"Huh, neat."

Meanwhile, Lynn made her way to the vault. The large safe door was locked up tight and nothing seemed to be amiss, but she decided to check inside just to be sure. She used her keycard to gain access to vault and when she looked inside she found a group of robbers that managed to tunnel their way into the bank. They didn't notice her at first since they were too preoccupied grabbing cash.

One of the robbers noticed her after looking up. "Shit, the fuzz!"

The robbers looked up and pointed their weapons at her.

* * *

"Oh, that's gotta hurt," Vern said as he watched a robber get clobbered by the Librarian, he tossed some popcorn in his mouth. "Hate to be those poor suckers down there."

"Uuuugh...my head..." Chuck said as he slowly awoke from his unexpected nap. The portly security guard huffed as he got to his feet. "Gaahh...Vern...?"

"Yup, it's me Chucky. Got caught with your pants didn't you?"

Chuck rubbed his head and tried to clear his mind. As he did, he noticed something, no, someone in the corner behind Vern.

"Vern, who's that in the corner?"

Vern turned around. It was the robber who knocked out Chuck. He was badly beaten, in a straightjacket, and had duct tape over his mouth.

"Oh, that's they guy the caught you with your pants down."

"Where did you get the straightjacket?"

"I had one. Sometimes I like to practice getting out of it, and I find it better than tying someone up."

"We have cuffs you know."

"But, someone can break them. That thing, isn't so easy to break."

"Huh...where's Lynn?"

"Taking on all the other robbers."

Chuck blinked. "Wait...what?"

"You heard what I said."

"Shouldn't we be helping her? Did you even call the police?!"

Vern held up a hand. "I called the boys in blue, Chuck. And Miss Lynn here can handle the situation PERFECTLY fine, look." he motioned to a monitor.

At that precise moment, Lynn delivered a punch so hard it knocked a tooth out of a robber's mouth. It hit and bounced off one of the cameras.

"If I were you, I'd sit back and watch her kick some ass. Cause after this, we gotta do a WHOLE LOTTA paperwork." he handed him the tub of popcorn. "Want some?"

* * *

 **A/N: Nothing special. Review if you want.**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	6. Monster Facts 2

Excerpt from Dr. Kulebrix's Monster Encyclopedia pg. 742-753

Biblotarian/Librarian ( _humanus libroca_ )  
Type: Humanoid  
Threat: Minimal-Extreme

Biblotarians or more known as simply Librarians are the sworn protectors and caretakers of the Library (see pg. 473). Unlike most protectors, Librarians are not bound to the Library and are free to leave its presence without any sort of consequence. However, it is rare a Librarian will leave the sanctuary of the Library and venture into the wild.

As the Librarians live in a place where all knowledge is stored from the beginning of time, it is easily known that all Librarians know what is in there. This means they know everything: past events, people, places, objects, even time recorded up to the exact present. But know this, Librarians cannot see the future, nor can predict events based on chance. Their extent of knowledge is only on what happened so far in history.

Librarians are tasked with protecting the Library from any harm, whether it is from a full-scale attack or if someone is being too loud (the Library is very sensitive to loud noises). All Librarians have some sort of electrical charge that they can unleash onto their target. The charge power can range from a shock equivalent to a Taser to ones that can rival a lightning bolt. Strangely, this 'charge' is not electrical in any sense, yet it acts like electricity. Further observation is required for me to determine what this charge is.

The charge allows Librarians to eliminate the threat or threats quickly and efficiently. If the threat manages to evade such charges, Librarians are proficient and deadly at close-range combat. Combine this with their extensive knowledge makes them to be a threat to be reckoned with.

The Librarian is one of the few monsters that cannot be easily distinguished from normal humans, but their behavior is what can distinguish one from a human. I've seen that most Librarians heavily suppress emotion. I do not know why they do this, but one can only speculate. I also seen that Librarians dislike loud noises, most likely conditioned onto them by the Library.

Librarians do not pose a threat directly to humans at all. They are only a threat if you choose to destroy the Library or if you're too loud in there. Since I have no records of a Librarians in the wild, I can only assume that they share similar qualities to those who stay in the Library.


End file.
